Purification of the Soul

In the name of Allah, We praise Him, seek His help and ask for His forgiveness. Whoever Allah guides none can misguide, and whoever He allows to fall astray none can guide them aright. I bear witness that there is no god but Allah, alone, and I bear witness that Muhammad is his servant and Messenger.

Do you know the last public place that the Messenger of Allah – sallallahu 'alayhi wa sallam – was seen? He was seen in the Masjid. About 3 days before he passed away, Abu Bakr – radiallahu 'anhu – was leading the prayer and the Masjid was full with an 'Ummah of men and women prepared to illuminate the world with their Jihad and da'wah. The Prophet's house opened up to the Masjid and there was a curtain separating his room and the prayer hall. He opened the curtain and saw the congregation and saw his Khalifah Abu Bakr – radiallahu 'anhu – leading the prayer. The Prophet – sallallahu 'alayhi wa sallam – smiled like a moon. The companions saw him while they were in prayer, and from their happiness, almost lost control of the prayer. The Prophet – sallallahu 'alayhi wa sallam – then drew his curtain and three days later returned to his Lord – subhanahu wa ta'ala.

During the life of the Prophet – sallallahu 'alayhi wa sallam – there was a women who used to sweep the Masjid with her hands, picking up the dirt and disposing of it. In the sight of the community her status was not that high, but in the sight of Allah and her Messenger – sallallahu 'alayhi wa sallam – she held a different rank. She passed away one night and the Companions, not wanting to disturb the Prophet – sallallahu 'alayhi wa sallam, washed and buried her without informing him. The next day, the Prophet – sallallahu 'alayhi wa sallam – recognized her absence and inquired about her. They told him about her demise and how they did not want to disturb him. The Prophet – sallallahu 'alayhi wa sallam – was not happy at the action they took. He went to her grave and prayed for her there.

What is a Masjid? Many have misunderstood the role the Masjid plays in the development of the Community. In some countries, it is a place where the tribal imam is buried and worshipped. In other places, it is a place that only prayers may be performed therein, absolutely nothing else will be tolerated. And in yet other places, not even prayers are performed in it, so-much-so the country may finally decide to convert it into a museum or a church.

Dear brother and sister, I would like to introduce you to our friend, the Masjid:

Literally, Masjid means a place of prostration. Technically, Masjid is any clean place on earth, as the Messenger of Allah – sallallahu 'alayhi wa sallam – said, "The earth was made for me a MASJID (i.e. a place to pray), pure." [Bukhari]

However, custom allocated to the word Masjid a specific place, the place where the 5 daily prayers are held. This was done in order to distinguish the Masjid from the Musallah, the place where 'Eid prayers are held and so forth, so that the rules of the Masjid do not apply to it.

Masjid is a word derived from sujud, or prostration. The Masjid, or place of prostration, was such named due the honorable position the sujud holds in Salah. Thus it was not called Marka' derived from Ruku' and so on.

The first house of Allah ever built on earth was the Ka'bah. Allah – subhanahu wa ta'ala – says:

"Verily, the first House (of worship) appointed for mankind was that at Bakkah (Makkah), full of blessing, and a guidance for Al-'Alamin." [Al-Qur'an 3:96]

And Allah – subhanahu wa ta'ala – commanded us to honor and enliven the Masjid with His rememberance:

"In houses (masajid), which Allah has ordered to be raised, in them His name is glorified in the mornings, and in the evenings." [Al-Qur'an 24:16]

Ibn Abbas, Mujahid, and al-Hasan commented: "The houses are those Masajid that were dedicated to the worship of Allah. And verily, the Masajid light up the earth for the inhabitants of the heavens, just as stars light up the heavens for the inhabitants of the earth."

Everyone wants to build a retirement home to be proud of. Let them listen to this offer. The Messenger of Allah – sallallahu 'alayhi wa sallam – said, "Whoever builds a Masjid, seeking the pleasure of Allah, Allah shall build a house for him in Paradise." [Bukhari]

He also – sallallahu 'alayhi wa sallam – said, "The most beloved places to Allah on earth are the Masajid, and the most hated places to Allah on earth are the Markets." [Muslim]

The Masjid played a variety of roles in our history. Following is a short tour of some of the roles that the Masjid played:

Children: The Masjid was a place where the children would accompany their parents and grow up under the shade of it's walls. Abu Qatadah narrated that the the Messenger of Allah – sallallahu 'alayhi wa sallam – used to pray and carry Umamah the daughter of Zaynab. When he would fall into prostration, he would rest her aside. And when he stood up again, he would again pick her up. [Bukhari]

Education: The Masjid was the nucleus of education. Throughout history, the Masjid was the university that graduated scholars and imams. To name only a few, there was the Masjid of al-Azhar, Masjid al-Umawi in Syria, and Masjid az-Zaytunah in Tunis.

The Prophet – sallallahu 'alayhi wa sallam – said, "No gathering gathers in a house from the houses of Allah, reciting the book of Allah and teaching it to one another, except that serenity befalls them, Mercy envelops them, the angels surround them and Allah mentions them to (the inhabitants of the heavens)." [Muslim]

Organization: The Masjid is where hundreds of Muslims come, all in straight rows, all following the lead of Allahu Akbar, all beginning when the Imam begins, all ending when the Imam ends.

Shelter for the weak and traveling: In Masjid an-Nabawi, we know that there was a platform, known as the Suffah. There the poor and the strangers would find shelter and the Messenger of Allah – sallallahu 'alayhi wa sallam – would grant them shares of the collected charity.

Solicializing: The Masjid is where the Muslims would meet one another. When someone missed a prayer, he was followed up. Relationships were reared, brotherhood was built.

Think tank: When important issues came up, the Prophet – sallallahu 'alayhi wa sallam – would gather the Companions in the Masjid and consult them in the matter.

Charity: The charity would be collected and distributed from the Masjid. It was in the Masjid that the Prophet – sallallahu 'alayhi wa sallam – said, "Give, if only with a half a date."

Jihad: It was from the Masjid that battalions were organized and set off for Jihad. During the crusades, many Masajid became the podium for inciting the feelings of the Muslims to fight off the transgression.

Serenity: Whenever the Prophet – sallallahu 'alayhi wa sallam – felt sad he would go and pray. And he – sallallahu 'alayhi wa sallam – would say to Bilal, "Relax us with (the prayer) O Bilal."

Part II: The Rights of the Masjid

The Masjid is the house of Allah – subhanahu wa ta'ala – and it has rights like anyone else. Amongst these rights are the following:

1. When someone enters the Masjid, they should pray 2 rak'ah before sitting down. The Prophet – sallallahu 'alayhi wa sallam – said, "If any of you enters the Masjid, let him not sit down until he prays 2 rak'ah."
2. No business should take place in the Masjid. The Messenger of Allah – sallallahu 'alayhi wa sallam – said, "Whoever sells in the Masjid, say to them: May Allah not grant success in your sale."
3. The Masjid must be kept clean and fresh smelling. The Prophet – sallallahu 'alayhi wa sallam – said, "Whoever eats from this tree (i.e. Garlic) should not attend our place of prayer."
4. Advice should be given to fellow Muslims. When the Prophet – sallallahu 'alayhi wa sallam – would see someone not praying correctly he would advise them to repeat their prayer and teach them how to pray.
5. Allah – subhanahu wa ta'ala – should be remembered much during one's stay in the Masjid. As Allah – subhanahu wa ta'ala – says, "O you who believe, remember Allah with much remembrance." [Al-Qur'an 33:42]
6. And finally, Allah – subhanahu wa ta'ala – tells us of the kind of people that are recognized as the people of the Masjid - "In it are men that love to purify themselves, And Allah loves those who make themselves pure." [Al-Qur'an 9:108]

May Allah – subhanahu wa ta'ala – give us the blessing of being amongst those that establish the Masjid and are included amongst those whom Allah – subhanahu wa ta'ala – loves.

Allah says in the Qur'an:

"Indeed in the Messenger of Allah you have an excellent example to follow for him who hopes in (the meeting with) Allah and the Last Day and remembers Allah much." [Al-Qur'an 33:21]

This is a very great blessing for this 'Ummah. Allah has given us a perfect example of how to apply this religion. In every aspect of our lives, we have a human example to look to. We can see how he behaved under different circumstances and we can know with certainty that the way he behaved was in accordance with the revelation of Allah.

This is just one of the many blessings that we Muslims have received. In the other religions, such as Christianity or Judaism, they do not have such a wonderful example. They do not possess a detailed and authentic record of how their prophets lived. Hence, when it comes to day to day matters in their lives, they have no authentic reference that they can turn to that will give them the satisfaction of knowing what God wants from them in each and every moment of their lives.

If we look at how humans behave around us, it is common or normal for people to look at others and to take them as their examples. Indeed, for the majority of the people, it seems that they are in need of an example. Perhaps such examples give them guidance, hope and confidence.

Al-Hamdulillah, Allah has provided us with the best possible example. We Muslims do not have to look to the kinds of people that the non-Muslims are looking at as examples and sources of guidance. We don't have to look to movie actors, rock stars, athletes, or politicians as our sources of guidance. Believe it or not, this is who the disbelievers are looking at as their examples. This is why they always have such people give "public broadcasting announcements" about AIDS, drinking while drunk and so forth. These people are asked to give these announcements because they are the people that so many others look up to, admire and take as their role models. The saddest thing is when Muslims also start taking these people as their role models. Allah has blessed us with the most excellent role model and yet we turn to people like this.

We must turn to the Messenger of Allah, peace be upon him, as our role model. However, not everyone has access or the time to study the life of the Prophet Muhammad, peace be upon him. Furthermore, the time that he lived was many years ago and something's have changed since that time - some people cannot see that although things have seemed to change, in reality, they have not fundamentally changed since the time of the Prophet, peace be upon him.different circumstances and we can know with certainty that the way h

For these and other reasons, even devout Muslims look to other people as, you could say, 'supplementary' role models or examples. People who are closer to their own situation and environment. Many of us need to see examples and role models in front of us today who are reacting to the thing that are going on now. All Muslims probably realise that the Prophet, peace be upon him, is the best example but sometimes it is simply hard for them to figure out exactly how that example fits into their life today when they are, for example, living in a non-Muslim environment where haram things are all around them. How does one cope in such an environment? What does one do when faced with specific situations in this environment?

In these cases, who should we take as examples and role models? The answer is those people who are taking their example from the Prophet, peace be upon him, and through their knowledge and understanding of the Prophet, peace be upon him, are applying his teachings to today's situation. That is, in essence, those people of knowledge and taqwa. They are the heirs of the Prophet, peace be upon him, as he stated in the hadith:

"The scholars are the heirs of the Prophets." [Ahmad, at-Tirmidhi, and others, according to al-Albani, it is sahih, Sahih al-Jami as-Saghir, no. 6297])

They have the knowledge to understand the Qur'an and the Sunnah and see its guidance for today. And they have the taqwa to apply that knowledge today. Knowledge without taqwa is not sufficient, and taqwa without knowledge is also not sufficient.

That is who we should be taking as examples for our own lives. But there is another very important aspect to this topic that I would like to stress. That is, whether you like it or not, whether you even realise it or not, virtually every single one of you is an example and a role model for somebody else. Again, you may not realise that fact but it is the case. The Messenger of Allah, peace be upon him, was an example for the entire 'Ummah, and this role has passed on to us with respect to certain individuals. Some reflection will make you realise that this is exactly the case.

Many of you have younger brothers or sisters. It is very common for younger brothers and sisters to look up to their older siblings. Many times their older siblings are much closer to them than their parents, with respect to age, lifestyle, environment, problems, concerns and so forth. Therefore, they may not look to their parents in issues that concern drugs, alcohol, sex, dating and so forth. There may be a generation gap and they feel that their parents are out of touch with what is going on now. Perhaps even more dangerous, there may be a cultural gap - wherein immigrant parents have children who grew up in this country and children are definitely Americans while the parents are still somewhat Pakistani, or Arab or Malaysian or whatever the case might be.

So they look up to their older brother or sister. They look to see how their older siblings are coping with their own problems. They take their example because of the love and mutual trust that usually exists among such siblings. What kind of example do you set for younger siblings? Are they memorising the Qur'an because they have seen you memorising the Qur'an and you have influenced them or encouraged them to memorise the Qur'an? Or are they spending all of their time playing basketball and chasing after members of the opposite sex because that is the example you set for them?

One of the greatest influences on others is the set of friends that a person has. In fact, the Prophet, peace be upon him, said:e meeting with) Allaah and the Last Day and remembers Allaah much" (al

"The person follows the way of his dear friend." [Abu Dawud, at-Tirmidhi, al-Albani calls it sahih. See Sahih al-Jami as-Saghir, no. 3545)

People always want to impress their friends and fit in with the group that they hang around with. Just think about when you were growing up, didn't you do many things just because your friends were doing them? If it was a fashion they were following, you wanted to follow the same fashion. If it was something dangerous or harmful, such as taking drugs or alcohol, it was your friends' examples that gave you the courage to try or do the same thing. What kind of example do you set for your friends?

Many of you are also parents. Listening to one's parents is something greatly stressed in Islam. The Prophet, peace be upon him, called disobeyed parents one of the greatest sins one could commit.l

Parents usually have a great deal of influence over their behaviour. There used to be an anti-smoking commercial in this country in which a father sits down and starts smoking and his small son sits next to him and picks up the cigarette package. Then the ad stated, "Like father, like son". This is very true. One time I was visiting a Muslim family and they had a small child. The small child kept looking at my beard and finally said, "You should remove that beard. See, my father does not have a beard".

It is very natural for children to have an extreme love for their parents. Love is one of the greatest factors in following a role model. One love them and therefore, wants to be like them. In fact, sometimes children take their parents as the standard by which they judge all other peoples and actions. Even to the point that if they are told something from the Qur'an or Sunnah, they reply, "But my parents don't do that and I believe that my parents are very good Muslims and therefore ... "

There is a very important aspect concerning any role model but I want to mention it explicitly here while talking about parents as their children's role models. You have to remember that, as the cliche goes, "Actions speak louder than words". Many parents are very sincere and well-intended with respect to their children. They tell their children that they have to be Muslim and apply the laws of Islam. They teach this to their children over and over. However, at the same time, their actions display something else. They are telling their children one thing and they are behaving in a different manner. Many times it is your actions that have a much greater effect on your children than the "thereotical teachings" that you are giving them. If you tell your children that they have to pray and you yourself do not pray, they may be more affected by your example than what you are telling them.

You have an obligation to protect your children from the Hellfire. Part of that protection is to teach and guide them properly. However, always remember, the example you set for them may have the greatest influence over them. If it is a good example, praise and thank Allah. If it is an evil example, seek refuge in Allah, repent and mend your ways.

Husbands and wives also can be very influential examples for one another. It is not a coincidence that many times you find couples having some of the same characteristics or tendencies. You can find many cases where both spouses are dedicated to Islam or where both spouses are simply "marginal Muslims". You can even see how many a man or woman changes after marriage because of the influence of the spouse.

Anyone who is in a position of authority may be taken as a role model by others. If you are teacher, for example, your students will be looking up to you and may admire you. They may wish to be like you and will look at you as their role model.

Those of you who come from overseas to study here may be in a very special situation. You may be from a country where the majority of the people are illiterate or where it is considered a great thing to go and study in the West. When you return to your country, your friends, colleagues and even people you hardly know may be looking up to you and respecting you. They may greatly admire this man who got his degree from the United States of America! What kind of example are you going to set for them? Are you going to show them, by your deeds and your statements, "Look, I studied in the United States and I saw what it had to offer and it only increased my conviction in Islam and my realisation that I have to serve Allah alone". Or are you going to show them, by your deeds and your statements, "Look, I am a very educated person - educated in the West - and I know that it is not necessary to take religion that seriously and it is basically for the ignorant and backwards folk". Allah has given you the chance to be a very influential example and role model for your people back home. Make sure that you do not set the wrong example for them as that can be very disastrous for both you and the poor Muslims who take you as their role model.

Those people who are committee members of Islamic Centres or Mosques also must consider their position as examples for other people. What kind of effect do you think it has when the President, Vice-President or any committee member of a mosque does not even attend the mosque? If the leaders of the mosque do not even care about attending the mosque, why should the others care about attending or looking after the affairs of the mosque? What kind of message is the President sending to others when the only time they see him in the mosque in on Friday, Eid and when there is a board meeting? This is a disease that has afflicted many of our communities and many people have come to me to personally complain about the example that these people are setting. I have actually heard Muslims - especially the youth - say, "Why should I attend the mosque when the leaders of the mosque itself do not even attend it?"

Any time we are put into positions of authority, we must consider that a great trust from Allah. We must think about our behaviour and that effect it is having on others. We must do our best to set the right example for others as we never know who and how many people may be looking up to us and following our example.

Living here in this society, in particular, you are also an example - again, whether you realise it or not - for the non Muslims. In fact, you may be the only example of a Muslim that they may see. What kind of example are you setting for them? Are you setting an example that will lead them to want to know more about Islam and perhaps eventually become Muslim? Or are you setting an example for them that makes them believe that a Muslim is no different from anyone else today and there is nothing special about Islam, it is a weak or useless religion like all other religions today? Are you setting an example for them that makes them abhor Islam by your un-Islamic behaviour? Are you someone who is bringing people closer to Allah or taking people further away from Allah? The answer to that question may have a lot to do with the kind of example that you are setting for the non-Muslims who witness your behaviour.

As already being Muslims, you must realise that many newly converted Muslims may also take you as an example. When a person first becomes Muslim, he sees much variation in the practice of Islam among their application of the teachings of Islam. He will also see Muslims who practice to some extent but not to a great extent. And he will also see Muslim who virtually do not practice anything at all. He is a new Muslim. He does not have all the knowledge he needs to know which of these different groups is actually applying Islam correctly. Which one of these different groups is he going to befriend and take as an example in Islam? Suppose he takes you as his friend and he is looking to you to show him how he is supposed to behave as a Muslim. The example that you set for him may have a great deal of influence over how much he actually applies Islam. Again, beware! Beware of that example you are setting for others even when you may not realise that you are setting an example for others!

There is one last group of people who are also role models that I would like to talk about. This last group, in fact, can have the greatest positive effect as a role model or it can have the greatest negative effect. These are those people who are known to be knowledgeable about Islam. This group includes those who truly have knowledge and other Muslims recognise this fact. And this group also includes those who probably don't have much knowledge but they claim to have a great deal of knowledge and some people might be fooled or misled by them.

One of the worst things that happens in some communities is that those people who are considered the people of knowledge set bad examples for the others in the community. They do not attend the mosque on a regular basis. Their public appearance is not one that reflects true Islamic knowledge - for example, a man with his beard shaved off or a woman who does not wear hijab. They engage in things that are well-known not to be proper in Islam.

What is the effect of people of this nature? People will look at them and say, "Look this is a person of knowledge and he doesn't do this and that", or, "and he does this and that". They will conclude that there must not be anything wrong with those deeds as otherwise such a knowledgeable person would not be doing those things. Let us take the simple example of shaving the beard. A Muslim may look at a so-called learned Muslim and see that he has shaved his beard. Then he may say to himself, "I don't have his level of knowledge and those who tell me that I have to grow a beard also do not have his level of knowledge. Therefore it must not really be necessary for me to grow a beard".

Satan may use that bad example as a source of excuses for others. Even if they feel that something is wrong, they will say to themselves, "Ah, but so and so does it so it couldn't really be that bad", and therefore they do it.

At this point, someone might argue that he is not responsible for the example that others get from him. He is only responsible for his deeds and everybody else is responsible for their own deeds. In fact, Allah says clearly in the Qur'an in more than one place:

"No bearer of burdens shall bear the burden of another." [Al-Qur'an 6:164]

However, that verse does not mean that you are not responsible for the kind of influence you assert over others. The effect you have over others is, in fact, the result of your own deeds and part of the burden that you must bear. This is made clear in a number of hadith of the Prophet, peace be upon him. For example, he said:

"No one is killed unjustly but a share of his blood will be upon the first son of Adam for he was the first to introduce killing." [Al-Bukhari and Muslim]

Obviously, that son of Adam did not teach or encourage the later murderers to commit murder. But he set the example for them and, therefore, he shares in the sin of all of those who commit murder after him.

Another hadith states, "Whoever introduces some good practice in Islam which was followed after him (by people) would be assured of reward like the one who followed it without the reward of either fo them being diminished in anyway. And he who introduced some evil practice in Islam which was followed by others would bear the burden like that of the one who followed this (evil practice), without the burden of either of them being diminished in any way." [Muslim]

This particular hadith shows us the positive result of setting a good example and the negative result of setting a bad example. The story behind the hadith, which was concerned with giving charity, was wherein one Muslim set a good example for the others and the others followed suit. It was not that he had introduced something new into Islam as some people may mistakenly conclude from that hadith.

Therefore, the effect that you have on others and the examples that you set for others can very well be considered part of your deeds and part of what you earned. If it is a good example, you may receive great rewards for all of those people whom you influenced in a positive manner. If it is an evil example, you may be responsible for all of those people who followed your evil example.

Keep in mind, also, that you may not consider yourself an example or role model for anyone. In reality, as I tried to stress in this khutbah, whether you realise it or not and whether you like it or not, there is a great chance that you are a role model or example for some people around you. Think about your life and think about how you are influencing other people.

Look at the people close to you and see how they are behaving. Try to see if the mistakes they are making are the same mistakes that you make and that they, in fact, got them from you. Look to see if the good things they are doing are the same as the good things that you do and see if they actually got them from you.

Take the time to study this and take the time to think about it. The possibility of setting a good example is a wonderful opportunity to please Allah. It is an opportunity to follow the Prophet, peace be upon him, - the Prophet, peace be upon him, set an excellent example and we are supposed to follow his example by also setting an excellent example ourselves.

(s) The Friday Prayer: Part III

Spreading Kindness in the Home

'A'ishah radiallahu 'anha reported that the Messenger of Allah sallallahu 'alayhi wa sallam said, "When Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala wills some good towards the people of a household, He introduces kindness among them." [Reported by Imam Ahmad in al-Musnad, 6/71; Sahih al-Jami', 303]

According to another report:

"When Allah loves the people of a household, He introduces kindness among them." [Reported by Ibn Abi ad-Dunya and others; Sahih al-Jami', no. 1704]

In other words, they start to be kind to one another. This is one of the means of attaining happiness in the home, for kindness is very beneficial between the spouses, and with the children, and brings results that cannot be achieved through harshness, as the Prophet sallallahu 'alayhi wa sallam said:

"Allah loves kindness and rewards it in such a way that He does not reward for harshness or for anything else." [Reported by Muslim, Kitab al-Birr wa as-Sillah wa'l-Adab, no. 2592]

Helping One's Wife with the Housework

Many men think that housework is beneath them, and some of them think that it will undermine their status and position if they help their wives with this work.

The Messenger of Allah sallallahu 'alayhi wa sallam, however, used to "sew his own clothes, mend his own shoes and do whatever other work men do in their homes." [Reported by Imam Ahmad in al-Musnad, 6/121; Sahih al-Jami', 4927]

This was said by his wife 'A'ishah radiallahu 'anha, when she was asked about what the Messenger of Allah sallallahu 'alayhi wa sallam used to do in his house; her response described what she herself had seen. According to another report, she said:

"He was like any other human being: he would clean his clothes, milk his ewe and serve himself." [Reported by Imam Ahmad in al-Musnad, 6/256; as-Silsilat as-Sahihah, 671]

She radiallahu 'anha was also asked about what the Messenger of Allah sallallahu 'alayhi wa sallam used to do in his house, and she said:

"He used to serve his family, then when the time for prayer came, he would go out to pray." [Reported by al-Bukhari, al-Fath, 2/162]

If we were to do likewise nowadays, we would achieve three things:

1. We would be following the example of the Prophet sallallahu 'alayhi wa sallam;
2. We would be helping our wives; and
3. We would feel more humble, not arrogant.

Some men demand food instantly from their wives, when the pot is on the stove and the baby is screaming to be fed; they do not pick up the child or wait a little while for the food. Let these ahadith be a reminder and a lesson.

Being Affectionate Towards and Jovial with the Members of Your Family

Showing affection towards one's wife and children is one of the things that lead to creating an atmosphere of happiness and friendliness in the home. Thus the Messenger of Allah sallallahu 'alayhi wa sallam advised Jabir radiallahu 'anhu to marry a virgin, saying:

"Why did you not marry a virgin, so you could play with her and she could play with you, and you could make her laugh and she could make you laugh?" [The hadith is reported in a number of places in the Sahihayn, such as al-Bukhari, al-Fath, 9/121)

The Prophet sallallahu 'alayhi wa sallam also said:

"Everything in which Allah's name is not mentioned is idleness and play, except for four things: a man playing with his wife." [Reported by an-Nisa'i in 'Ushrat al-Nisa', p. 87; also in Sahih al-Jami']

The Prophet sallallahu 'alayhi wa sallam used to treat his wife 'A'ishah radiallahu 'anha affectionately when doing ghusl with her, as she radiallahu 'anha said:

"The Messenger of Allah and I used to do ghusl together from one vessel, and he would pretend to take all the water so that I would say, 'Leave some for me, leave some for me,' " - and both of them were in a state of janabah (impurity). [Muslim bi Sharh an-Nawawi, 4/6]

The ways in which the Prophet sallallahu 'alayhi wa sallam showed affection towards young children are too famous to need mentioning. He often used to show his affection towards Hasan and Husayn, as mentioned above. This is probably one of the reason why the children used to rejoice when he came back from travelling; they would rush to welcome him, as reported in the sahih hadith, "Whenever he came back from a journey, the children of his household would be taken out to meet him." He sallallahu 'alayhi wa sallam used to hug them close to him, as 'Abdullah ibn Jafar radiallahu 'anhu said:

"Whenever the Prophet sallallahu 'alayhi wa sallam came back from a journey, we would be taken out to meet him. One day we met him, Hasan, Husayn and I. He carried one of us in front of him, and another on his back, until we entered Madinah." [Sahih Muslim, 4/1885-2772; see the commentary in Tuhfat al-Ahwadhi, 8/56]

Compare this with the situation in some miserable homes where there are no truthful jokes [i.e., jokes that do not involve lying], no affection and no mercy. Whoever thinks that kissing his children goes against the dignity of fatherhood should read the following hadith from Abu Hurayrah radiallahu 'anhu who reported that the Messenger of Allah sallallahu 'alayhi wa sallam kissed al-Hasan ibn 'Ali, and al-Aqra' ibn Habis at-Tamimi was sitting with him. Al-Aqra' said, "I have ten children and I have never kissed any one of them." The Messenger of Allah sallallahu 'alayhi wa sallam looked at him and said:

"The one who does not show mercy will not be shown mercy."

Have you ever wondered to yourself what it actually means to be the best?

The first of the ranks of the journey of servititude ('ubudiyah) is awakening, which is alarming and stirring up of the heart from the sleep of heedlessness. By Allah, how priceless is that revitalising alarm! How valuable and indispensable for the journey! Whoever experiences it, by Allah, he has indeed experienced the breeze of success. Without experiencing it, every one is lost in heedlessness. His hearing is asleep while his eyes appear awake. It is this blessed alarm that wakes one up and makes him a seeker of Allah. The seeker now rolls up his sleeves and musters up his courage to set out on the journey to Allah, station by station.

Perhaps it is this rising up from sleep that is mentioned in the following Qur'anic verse:

"Say: I exhort you only to one thing, that you rise up for Allah's sake in twos and singly, then ponder; there is no madness in your fellow citizen (Muhammad); he is only a warner to you before a severe chastisement." [Al-Qur'an 34:46]

The first realisation that illuminates the seeker upon this awakening is the immensity of gifts of Allah upon him. The believer's heart glances at the gifts and bounties of Allah and is overwhelmed by his own sense of inability to even count them, let alone thank Allah for them all. The second realisation is the realisation of the inadequacy of his gratitude and worship to Allah. These realisations are in fact both the cause and the effect of the first station of awakening. As the believer [alternatively, the seeker, for there is no difference between the two, every believer is indeed a seeker of Allah – translator] advances on his journey and as his heart is sharpened by these two realisations, it becomes incumbent upon him to notice more and more the innumerable inner and outer, open and hidden gifts of Allah and recognise his own shortcoming in thanking the Giver adequately. These two realisations make the seeker actualise the supplication of the Prophet, may the prayers and blessings of Allah be upon him, in which he said: "(O Allah), I admit Your bounties upon me, and I admit my sin, so forgive me, for no one can forgive but You!" [Al-Bukhari] At this point, one realises why this supplication is indeed the master of all supplications for forgiveness (as the Prophet has told us). The believer also realises at this point that if Allah were to punish all the dwellers of Heavens and the Earth, He would not be in the wrong. If, on the other hand, He were to exonerate and reward them all, his reward and mercy would far exceed their deeds. The believer, therefore, realises that he must be ever mindful of Allah's bounties and his own shortcomings.

None Enters It Except the Pure

The seeker inevitable realizes his sins and failings, and feels that he is in serious danger on account of them. He remembers Almighty Allah's censure for those who forget the verses of Allah after they have been reminded of them:

"And who is more wrongful than one who is reminded of the verses of Allah, yet he evades them, and forgets what is awaiting him." [Al-Qur'an 18:57]

Once the seeker is fully cognizant of his offences, he rolls up his sleeves to compensate for what has been lost. He breaks off the shackles of sins with the strength of istighfar (seeking forgiveness) and penance. He yearns for purification, just like the purification of gold and silver from impurities when they are burnt, so that he may enter the Paradise prepared by his Lord for him, for nothing impure can ever enter the Paradise:

" … those whose lives the angels take in a state of purity, saying (to them), "Peace be on you, enter the Garden, because of (the good) which you did (in the world)." [Al-Qur'an 16:32]

This purification is carried out by four means:

1. Repentance by turning away from sins (tawbah);
2. Actively seeking forgiveness (istighfar);
3. Good deeds that erase the bad ones; and
4. and calamities that efface the sins.

If one is purified by these four means, he becomes of those who is greeted and congratulated by the angles upon death, and assured by them of his abode in the Paradise, and that he shall see grief and fear no more. Without any of these four, one's repentance is not complete and is not likely to be enough to counter balance his sins.

After one's death, when he is in the state of barzakh (the state between death and the Final Day), his sins may be effaced by the following:

1. Funeral salah for him performed by the faithful;
2. The trials of the grave (may Allah protect us from this);
3. What his brothers from the Muslims present to him after his death, of virtuous deeds, like charity, Hajj, fasting, recitation of the Qur'an and salah on his behalf. The jurists agree that the charity and supplications of the living will reach him and benefit him after his death. The majority include Hajj in this list, while the Hanabilah include all good deeds in this list; the Hanbali way being the most liberal of all in this matter.

Those who are still not purified by these means, may be purified by the dreadfulness of the Day of Resurrection or by intercession of those whom Allah will allow to intercede that Day, and finally and most importantly, by the pardoning of his Most Forgiving Lord.

If one's sins are still remaining, the Fire or the purgatory then purifies him, the extent of this punishment being proportional to one's sins. When one is cleansed of sins and corruption, and all that is left is pure and good, he is now entered into the Paradise, into which one but the pure may enter.

Three Parts of the Realisation

The first of the two realisations, the recognition and appreciation of Allah's endless bounties, is assisted by three things: the light of intellect, Allah's favors, and consideration of the suffering of less fortunate people.

The light of intellect is the light that caused one's soul to wake up in the first place. One is able to appreciate the bounties of Allah only as much as the strength of this light allows him. Some may not realise Allah's bounties except in ordinary things like food, clothing, safety and their standing in the society. Such people may not have even a piece of this light from Allah, for the real bounty to consider and appreciate is the bounty of Islam, of Îman, of Allah's message, of the opportunity to remember Him and the honour to obey Him. This faith is the supreme bounty and gift of Allah, and one cannot see it expect with the illuminated inner eye.

Sensing the rays of Allah's favors through the clouds of mundane life and darkness of the desiring self is the second part of appreciation. One observes the unfortunate people who are heedless of Allah, or lost in innovations (ibtida') and forgotten the essence of the Din of Allah. Such disbelievers and innovators are indeed greater in misery and suffering than those who are dying of starvation and disease. Once the seeker realises the misery of the misguided, he realises the immensity of Allah's mercy upon him to have guided him, for things are known through their opposites.

The Second Realisation: Our Shortcomings

The second of the two realisations associated with the awakening of a believer is the realisation of one's sins, which again is assisted by three things. Realising the greatness of the Truth, knowing oneself, and certainty in Allah's admonitions.

Realising His greatness from the core of one's heart is the key to understanding the enormity of defying Allah, the Most High. If one contemplates in the greatness of Allah and his own infirmity and weakness before Allah, and his need for Allah at every moment of his life, the enormity and wrongness of his sins becomes glaringly obvious. Knowing the nothingness of one's own self before Allah, therefore, is an essential step in abandoning sins.

The axis of all success is belief in Allah's promises and admonitions; and if this belief dwindles or weakens in the heart, so does any hope for success. Allah has clearly told us that His verses and signs are of benefit only to those who believe in His promises and warning and fear the punishment of the afterlife:

"Indeed, in these there is a sign only for those who feared the Punishment of the Hereafter." [Al-Qur'an 11:103]

"You are a warner exclusively for those who fear it (the Last Day)." [Al-Qur'an 79:45]

Those deserving of salvation in this world and in the Hereafter are none but those who believe in and fear the admonition of Allah:

"And We will establish you (the believers) on the Earth after them (the disbelievers), that is the reward for those who feared meeting Me, and feared my admonition." [Al-Qur'an 14:14]

Remorse of the Lost Moments

One of the highest grades of this awakening is the realisation of the lost days of one's life, which leads to the commitment to compensate for the lost time and fill the remaining days with goodness and virtue. Such an awakened soul then is miserly about wasting even an hour, indeed even a breath, in anything that is not helpful in its journey to Allah. Every wasted moment is a regret and loss on that Day and a hindrance on the journey to Allah.

Three things enhance the remorse for the lost days and the concern to compensate for them in the remaining days of one's life; knowledge, responsiveness to admonition, and company of the righteous. The more one knows the worth of deeds and enormity of their consequences, the more he realises the worth of his loss. Similarly, one's responsiveness to the admonisher of his heart (according to a hadith of the Prophet, every believer has an admonisher in his heart who warns him against possible sins) determines how much he can improve. The company of people who have great concern for the condition of their hearts and determination to reach the highest levels is another great help in the path of the seeker.

Thus ends the description of the first station (maqam) of the madarij (ranks) of the seekers of Allah.

(s) Madrajis as-Salikin (printed in Al-Jumu'ah Magazine)

The wisdom behind delaying the answer for a supplication:

It is puzzling your insistence on asking for your desires and when ever they were delayed your insistence increase without thinking that your are not granted what you ask for because of:

1. Your benefit (for what you have asked could be a harm to you in a way)
2. Your sins (for the sinner's prayers are not answered)

If it was the second reason, you will have to clear the path of answering from the stains of sins. If it was the first reason then look at what you ask for:

Is it to strengthen your religion, or just a plain earthly desire? If it was only an earthly desire, then know that it is the kindness and the mercy of Allah that delayed it for you, and by your insistence, you are like a child that asks for what harms him and he is denied that for his own good. And if you think that what you asked for is for the benefit of your religion then your benefit could be in delaying it, or the well-being of your faith is by the nonexistence of it.

In other words, the planning of the Truth the Almighty (Allah) is better for you than your own planning, and He could deprive you from what you ask to test your patience. So let Him see from you a determined patience and you will soon see from Him what will give you joy. And when you have cleaned the paths of answering (of supplication) from the stains of sin and was patient about what He has chosen for you, then every thing that happens to you is better for you weather you were given or deprived of what you have requested.